Writing is working and working is discipline...

It's not been easy getting back into writing habits after a long break. Not only was I on a fantastic trip for ten days and I have to have the discipline to create and keep to a writing schedule, it's also the smaller version of a break down I get once in a while due to my difficult path.

The path being a writing career.

It's difficult to feel like what I'm doing is the right thing, that I'm good at it and it will all pay off, when there are no signs of it going anywhere or any kind of encouragement. I did write an advertised article that I got paid for and was on the Detroit News and Detroit Free Press -- which was awesome! I didn't get a byline and it wasn't the kind of thing I wanted to get paid to write and I'm not sure I even consider it published, but I DID get paid and it was the highest ranked article they ran in the series. But that kind of encouragement only lasts so long. The company currently doesn't need anything written and therefore, no writers. 

My new beats headphones, a bright, fun pink, has gotten me into music while working in a way I haven't been into in a long time and it's fantastic! Helps from outside distractions as well.

I post pretty pictures of things that inspire and motivate me in order to double the inspiration and motivation. Sometimes it works! I've at least been editing more and I'm nearly done with my novella! Not sure what I'll do with it though... probably self publish it as a kindle once I submit and get rejected by Kindle Singles. 

Sometimes a change of scenery helps. There's a fantastic new coffee shop that opened in my town. It's big, open, a lot of tables to choose from and a lot of natural light. Not to mention some great cups of coffee! Here is a dirty chai. It's a chai with two shots of espresso and it's my new favorite drink, especially for autumn. The scenery and fancy drink helped me get a lot of editing done!

 A few things I read that help me feel inspired in certain ways. Bella Grace is a beautiful magazine (if you can call it that, it's more like a book) filled with people's narratives, essays, quotes and even writing prompts to enjoy life, be in the moment, notice the small things, that life is beautiful and full of magic. I submitted a piece to them, thinking it was not only a perjfect thing for me to read (I have three issues now) but that it's so me that it would be perfect for me to write for, too. Well, they didn't publish my piece.

It's hard to take rejection, especially from something you like, admire and feel inspired by so much. I'll keep reading it, keep being inspired by it, and I'll keep submitting to it as well.

There's also Womankind, also my third volume. It's different than Bella Grace. It can be a bit too feminist for me, but there are also some great articles about all sorts. This is an autumn/Halloween issue full of bats and caves and haunted castles! Totally inspiring.

I'm reading The Martian, which has had a LOT of hype, and so far I'm enjoying it. It's not inspriing in the way that I can take it to my own writing, but it's nice to read something not YA or complete fantasy sprinkled with angst romance. I've been having a seriousl problem reading 75% of a novel and then putting it down and starting a new book! I really need to finish my books. I have so many to read. So I'll finish this then I'll go back and finish all my mostly down novels. All whilst editing my own stories and starting new ones and maybe I can still get published in some way this year.

This is my year! It has to be.

The Path

There are some things we're lucky enough to get to do. And, I'm not sure we'll ever really believe those things happened.

I've been able to do a lot of those things. From meeting and marrying my husband, traveling to England to visit his family, to following my dream and writing.

Not everything is what we expect. And, success isn't measured how we expect it to be when we're in college. Sometimes that's a very hard thing to get through -- in fact I'm not sure I ever will. I constantly struggle with my personal success. I don't consider myself successful, not yet, and that can be a hindrance on my actual path and down the spiral goes. Sometimes when I think of that downward spiral, I try to imagine it's down the rabbit hole, off to a strange world I don't understand and didn't expect, but it's full of interesting characters and lessons and I'll eventually find my way out.

And, when I do, I'll be all the better for it. One day, I'll be published. It doesn't have to be big, I don't need to make a ton of money. My goad is to be published and to spend my life writing. I've been working on sending things to literary magazines, I've been writing a lot more poetry and I'm even working on an opportunity to do freelance copy writing. There are so many options and chances out there and I am willing to try them all. Of course I wanted to my big novel to be represented and published by a big house -- it's not even that naive of me, most writers write with a dream like that. If you're not dreaming, what are you doing?

This article sample I've been working on all week has been a bit of an eye opener. It's taking me a long time to write 500 words. 1. I have to do all the research, both on the company and the topic 2. I'm creating the theme and tone 3. It's not really creative and it's not quite business. It's somewhere in between and it's pretty exhausting! I'm not used to this kind of writing and it's taking a bit of a toll.
Even if it doesn't amount to anything (but in part of radical self love I won't say it probably won't), I am so proud of myself for trying. 100% of the opportunities you don't take are missed. There's no such thing as getting ahead or making progress or being successful and proud, without working for it.

To be honest, I came to write a post and show pictures of my trip to Wizarding World of Harry Potter last November! It just sort of got away from me after the first two paragraphs. And despite my reminiscing, these words poured out of me and they're more important.

In a time of the internet and lots of wonderful ladies (and men) going out there and starting their own career, businesses, blogs, youtube channels, online shops, and so many other things. We're just beginning to scratch the surface. Most of us didn't go to college expecting this to be the path we take (I sure as hell didn't, with two degrees and neither involving how to make it without a desk job), and college sure didn't teach me how to use the internet to better the life I chose.

I don't want to lose myself in anxiety, worry, perfectionism, self doubt or lack of confidence. All of these things have slowly taken over for the past 3 to 4 years. All I've got is now and I'm working my butt off to write. I write what I love and I love what I write.

What are things we can do to keep us strong?

That's a tough one to answer, we are all wired differently and find encouragement, inspiration, motivation and optimism in different ways.

What I've been doing:
-Meditating! It's not an easy one to start, then again, what is?! I have a meditation book and the calm.com app (which is also a site), and I've heard good things about the headspace app, too.
-Pampering. I haven't bought myself nice lotion, perfume, bubble bath or makeup in years. I decided to finally start buying some again. Slowly. I've started with Burt's Bees lotion and body wash. Yum! What a good way to feel confident and inspired!
-Reading!! My favorite thing. Not only fiction and young adult which I love, but also some non-fiction. Soon I will be purchasing Rain: A Natural and Cultural History, You're Never Weird on the Internet (Almost) by Felicia Day, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy Kaling, and Life with a Sprinkle of Glitter by Louise Pentland.
-Hobbies are important to keep your mind and body active in other ways. I am going to get back into cross stitching (just got a beautiful new cross stitch book - Secret Garden Embroidery by What Delilah Did) going on nature and beach walks and collecting things. Walking around the zoo is also a hobby of mine!
-I am very much looking forward to starting yoga. I am nervous, of course, as a complete beginner and feeling like there is no where I can go to feel comfortable. But a friend of mine invited me to go with her, assuring me it's very laid back. I'm willing to drive half an hour to give it a shot!

To all of us! Kicking butt!

Love,
Ash

Wooded Walk & Writing, Writing, Writing...

Hello and happy Tuesday lovely ladies and generous gents.

I'm just posting about life over here, so here are a few updates! Of course, it mostly involves reading, eating, and walking around!

From a walk I went on with my dad - what a beauty!

Husband makes me coffee every morning and sometimes, it's just a masterpiece!

One day last week I had poptarts for breakfast and...

Spaghetti Os for lunch! The 90s looked good on my desk ;)

I have been writing in The Little Gratefulness Diary (from Flow Magazine), everyday for a few weeks now. It's a 29 week thing and I'm loving it! Oh to write something you're grateful for every day. To stay positive and happy and grateful! Also, I'm trying to calm down (do the !! give me away), and relax. Learning to meditate. I'm also using calm.com app and site - it's all great so far.

I bought a typewriter! Isn't it beautiful? From the 70s and looks brand new! It has a few quirks when typing, the spacing goes a little wonky but that's okay, adds to the charm!

I've begun a few projects that I'm really excited about -- I'll be sharing some in a post soon!

Lucky Charms! With extra magical swirly diamond marshmallows. Just eating my way through the 1990s over here!

Been reading Gala Darlings Radical Self Love - I for one didn't know how she was until her book came out and some of the circles I follow on instagram were very excited. I looked it up and thought it might be something I would like. I read and loved Girlosophy as a teen and I hoped this would be like an adult version! I was a little skeptical, new agey things, lots of pink glitter girl warrior stuff. But I can take things away from anything and am so far enjoying this book! I'm even trying a bit of tapping (EFT) which I'm not saying works but it's a type of meditation and as I said before, I'm working on meditating! Keep you posted on all that I read! I'll have a post soon to wrap up June, too (it was kind of a sad month, to be honest).

I'll try to be posting more often. I don't spend a lot of time running around, or at least as much as I'd like to, going on adventures and finding new places. I do spend a lot of time writing and reading, so I'll just try to start sharing more on those things - it's who I am after all!

Let's meditate! And love ourselves and write about what we're grateful for every day! I would also say let's cook and eat healthier and less processed, but did you see all that terrible 90s food I posted?

It's raining again here, it's been a very rainy summer. I kind of don't mind it because you know... I sort of love the rain! I do wish there was a tad more sunshine. It rains pretty much some every day and I would LOVE a few more thunderstorms. 

Have a lovely week!

Goodbye May, Hello June!

May sort of went by quickly and I'm not sure I ever posted!

Unfortunately I only read one book (gasp!) last month, which doesn't really qualify for a mini review, given the book was only 60 pages.

I read Very Good Lives - JK Rowling's commencement speech from 2008. It was fantastic! I got my Mom and Dad to read it as well. I gave it 5 stars for inspiration, motivation, and all around healthy thinking and reading.

Here are a few pictures to wrap up the month of May.

Books I bought new in May

All books I got in May! Kindle represents End of Days, which isn't posted above, oops

Started reading Magonia. It's pretty good. I'm enjoying doing a lot of reading and writing outside. Except four our neighbor that smokes. And, he must be stressed lately because he's smoking every 5 minutes.

Went on a walk with my Dad. We keep trying to go on more but, busy times and lives!

Been having some stunning sunsets

 My Dad spotted this gorgeous moth and we observed it for a good ten minutes. Iridescent wings, black underneath makes him look spray painted white, fuzzy head. Just beautiful!

 James and I finally made it to Dinosauria at the Detroit Zoo. We got stuck in 30 minutes of car a line a few weekends ago, they weren't letting any more people in to park. So we abandoned and when we finally made it, it was busy but manageable. Didn't realize it would cost $5 a person but we had a great time. We ended up with free ice cream, too!

Admiring my London books collection

 Was pretty excited when I saw Bella Grace was out a few days early. I bought it immediately. Trying not to blaze through it as fast as I did the previous one. Halfway through. Savoring. Inspiration, motivation, peace.

 More time outside

 Though it's missing my newest succulent from my dad (outside soaking sun) I've been enjoying this corner of my desk. It's got a light, simple feeling to me. At least, compared to the rest of my desk and home and life. See my new bookends? They were bought and brought back from Malaysia (by a stranger)

Exquisite Corpse Coffee Shop

Recently revisited a coffee shop in Port Huron. There was a bad experience there a while back and we didn't go back until now. We had a really nice time. Good coffee, beautiful plants to inspire, and admire.

A few shots from the visit!

Breve! Huge breve...

I love the bowl of cactus and succulents.

It was a really pretty and peaceful place to work. The coffee, though massive, was really delicious. We got to spread out on the one large table next to a big window with lots of natural light and a lot of plants. We worked and talked for over an hour. It was really nice and I look forward to returning.

Happy Days

Good Morning!

It has been a good past week. First, I put in my two week notice at work! Here is my quitting outfit and face! Though I don't have a full outfit picture. We only have one small mirror. I wore a beautiful brocade skirt, it's pale mint with grey dots and the high waist is a grey and white scalloped, wide elastic.

 Then, I immediately began writing! Because, that's why I'm quitting. To put all my energy into what I love and into what is my career. My Mom discovered a newer magazine by one of our favorite publishers, Stampington Collection (I actually emailed them for a job right out of college, they responded saying I was funny and they'd keep me in mind if they were ever in the area), called Bella Grace. With a copy in hand, I knew it was perfect for me! All about living life to the fullest, finding magical moments in the ordinary, being happy and positive. It's absolutely beautiful, the pictures and the writing. The pages have a matt finish that smell and feel great and will stand the test of time. Oh, I read it in a few days and was in love. I wrote a few pieces, just train of thoughts about different topics that mean something to me. I already submitted one this past Monday and am working on some others. Even if nothing comes of it for this magazine, those essays mean something to me and it's getting me excited and inspired to write more.

 I read this delightful, light-hearted child's novel this week. I've been eyeing it for some time and got it on a whim at Meijer (or I should say, my Mom did for me, she's sweet like that). It was exactly as I hoped. Charming, funny, sweet, and plain fun. I think I will get more books by this author.

 An order from amazon finally arrived this week! I bought two novels I've been wanting to read (newer ones, I don't often indulge in), because I had a gift card from my birthday from January! Bone Gap! Not a lot of reviews on Amazon but on Goodreads things are interesting. People either really love it or don't like it at all! Most people seem to think it's strange and wonderful. I'm very excited!

As you can see here, Luna is also excited for Bone Gap. Actually this picture is to show you the other novel I received. Greenglass House! Very exciting! A magical looking middle grade novel that takes place in winter. Perfect research and inspiration for the novel I'm currently working on! Plus that cover is gorgeous!

 I read this fun little book from Neil Gaiman the other day. It's a goofy, one sitting book. The Illustrations were just as fantastic as the story.

Full, mini reviews (as in the mini reviews I give as a recap) will be up at the end of the month for all the books I read in April. 

Now some extra pictures of what I've been up to!

Pretty tea at Starbucks. James and I go about once a week together, to work on separate things, together on our graphic novel, and to play card games.

 Coloring is meditation. I've had this beautiful adult coloring book, Secret Garden, for a few years. I don't get a lot colored at any given time, but I've finished a half dozen pages over two years and they make me happy to work on and to see. I have another one, The Art of Nature, which is beautiful in its own way. I'd love to have the Enchanted Forest by the same artist that did the one shown here.

 Here are the other two things I got in my amazon order! I am so excited for this spring and summer. To hike, be on the beach, exploring! Watching birds and butterflies, finding beach glass and fossils, collecting butterfly wings, feathers, pressing leaves and flowers and everything and anything else!

Hello!

I'm hoping to share my life a little on this blog. I have many hobbies and things I like, and would enjoy sharing them on here. Here are some things I like and you can expect to find on blog:

• Books! Books so many books, books all the time. What I'm currently reading, pictures of books I own and want and maybe the occasional review.
• I like to go on walks and explore woods and beaches. I pick things up and put them in glass jars or vials (I always carry a few glass vials on me). Pictures of my walks, something I write while exploring, things I find.
• I enjoy decorating our small place with lots of stuff. Sometimes (most of the time) I'm very excited about pretty much everything. You can expect to see pictures and explanations of things.
• I'm a writer and I would love to share some of the smaller things I write on here!
• My cat Luna. Lots of pictures. And, stories.
• My husband may get a mention once in a while :)
• I greatly enjoy to craft and I am a bit sporadic in what I do and when. For example I do a bit of smash booking/scrap booking, I cross stitch and can make origami cranes and boxes. I also really enjoy just about all paper goods and play around with making all sorts. I dabble A LOT. I would love to be great at everything.
• Spring is coming so the husband and I will be out shooting our recurve bows very soon. I'll be getting amped up to show photos and talk about it. We've been very casual about it for the past two years and I'm not very good but, maybe this spring we'll get more into it and do it often enough to get some skill.
• I am a member of the Cloud Appreciation Society, so get ready for pictures of the sky!
• Also a member of Detroit Zoological Society.
• The usual: Food and coffee, I am indeed a fan of brunch.
• I watch a lot of TV
• All the new things I want to get into! I am always finding new things I like. There's so much to enjoy and I love to learn. 

Things I'm currently into:

• Birds maybe? I'm going to buy a bird book, flashcards and binoculars possibly this weekend!
• Sewing. I work in a fabric shop and am constantly falling in love with pretty pieces. I finally bought some, too. I made an infinity circle skirt and plan on making another skirt, a dress and a few more scarves -- all this spring!
• Plants! As in, I have an air plant and a succulent and I'm trying very hard not to kill them. I desperately want more.